Sunday 26 August 2018

Enough is Enough

Okay, I have a bone to pick with some of the Christian community. I have heard so many cases of the scenario this post will describe, and of the sometimes irrevocable damage it inflicts, and it makes me weep with heartache and fury. Those of you who say the phrase I'll be addressing almost certainly have the best intentions, but your ignorance causes so much harm that you will never see, and I want this post to save as much future pain as possible.

When Christians confide in each other about how they are suffering currently - it doesn't even have to have a label of "depression", it can just be a really rough patch - a response they apparently often hear is: "But God should be enough for you." No matter how noble your intentions, this is one of the most unhelpful and damaging things you can say, and I really hope this post explains clearly and faithfully why and how you can change.

Firstly, let me show you how this is faulty logic. You say that God should be enough. What do you mean by "enough"? Do you mean that God's omnipotence, generosity and boundless love fills our spirit so we feel no other desires or distractions, as described in the Bible? This is true...or it will be, when we have perfect unity with Him. We still live in a fallen world, and we ourselves are still fallen, because we still sin. How/why do we still sin? Because we don't love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength. Because God doesn't feel enough for us even when we're in a period of our lives where we are showered with His blessings, let alone when we feel distant from Him. What I'm trying to say is you're right; God's love should be enough for us, for everyone. But the very fact that we are fallen, that we are still sinful, is both the cause and the symptom of our sickness, that we don't think He is enough. No one does. And saying that is not helpful; the person suffering also reads the Bible, also listens to the sermons. They know God should be enough, but the reality is that in that rough period of theirs, He doesn't feel like He is. So instead of helping them, you have told them no knew information and instead reminded them of something else they lack.

Which brings me on to my second point. Let me show you how damaging saying that is. Picture the situation; a young woman from your regular service walks up to you, shy and nervous and steeling herself for a task that is very difficult. She tells you that her work life is extremely difficult right now, that she's feeling really insecure in her love life - whether in a relationship or single - that she had hoped for praise for a piece of work she put her heart into, and she has approached you, terrified, for comfort. Do you really, in that moment, think it's a good idea to turn to that lost and broken woman and say: "You're a bad Christian, too"? Because that is what people hear when you say that. That is such an awful thing to say, another knife in their heart that, for His own purposes, God just won't pull out no matter how loud they cry out to Him. It is especially painful if that is the only "help" you give them.

Now here is something I learnt in a recent sermon that really stuck with me. In the Bible, does it say that we should just pray for the hungry, the naked, the persecuted, etc? Of course not; we are to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, defend the persecuted. All very practical commands, all about action. That broken woman who walked up to you is in need of your practical help, though the effect may be psychological. Tell them you know how much that piece of work meant to them; tell them about a hard point in your own work life, emphasising that you feel their pain; tell them that you understand love life difficulties, because almost all of us would have felt those insecurities. God does not call us first to convert our neighbours but to love them. So love them.

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